Last Night
by Swamp-Eyes
Summary: The day before Tidus' marriage with Yuna, he and Rikku have a trip around Spira, to celebrate as friends. But before the morning comes, Rikku has to face her true feelings.. [Tikku..][Complete]
1. Flying to Zanarkand

**Last Night  
**

* * *

_Well, the clock says it's time to close now  
I guess I'd better go now, I know I have to go now  
I really want to stay here all night  
All night  
All night_

(The Doors)

* * *

- And, finally, that's Zanarkand – Rikku said, her voice pretentiously solemn, waving one hand graciously, to emphasise the breathtaking spectacle in front of them, still not leaving the Celsius' controls with the other. 

And, actually, on the horizon, Zanarkand ruins were standing out.

So, they were there  
God, what a long day.

And this was their last stop.

- It's gorgeous! - Tidus shouted with his usual enthusiasm, jumping beside her in the pilot seat - Rikku, higher!

The sky of Zanarkand near Mt. Gagazet always was so sick full of stars, that there was no free spaces in it, and barely it seemed to be night.  
It was neither blue, nor black.  
Grey, probably, or rather green...?  
It usually had something which possessed you completely, both body and mind, but this night...

This night even the sky wasn't enough to cheer Rikku up. Her eyes were delighted, but her mind remained completely untouched by it, though the airship really was flying high, and the stars seemed to be inches-away from them.

- Ehy Rikku! - Tidus began tapping on her shoulder - Let me drive the Celsius. You promised you would let me when we were in Luca! You just have to.

Rikku rolled her eyes laughing  
- I never said something like that... . – she lied.

Tidus jumped up, grinning significantly- You liar! You're trying to fool me, aren't you...? - he began to pull some strands of her hair

- Aaaah! Ok, ok... - she gave in, while Tidus was shaking her shoulder - But only because you're worst than a child!

- Wonderful!

- ... and because this, if God bless me, will make you shut up... So, are you ready..? GO! - Rikku suddenly removed both her hands from the controls, jumping easily away from the pilot seat.

- Whoa! - Tidus try to catch the controls somehow, already worried about the terrible air-pocket the Celsius had to face immediately after Rikku had left her seat. - What the _heck_ were you trying to do, kill us _both_? Rikku...? Help! Come back here! Ehy I need your assistance!

She just laughed. Surely Tidus_ was_ funny.

- And why? You're doing a great job! Keep it up!

- Rikku...! What..

- Make it to Zanarkand! Good luck! I will help you with the landing, eventually...

- You're kiddin' me, right..? Where are you going?

- I've to check the engine room... Good luck!

- Rik...

Too late. The airtight door closed behind Rikku's shoulders, as she was leaving the bridge, and Tidus voice disappeared completely.

In that moment, all turned different.

Immediately a heavy distress dropped on her, finding her quite unprepared.

If when she could see him, this never happened...  
If when she could speak with him, laugh with him, she felt she was alive...

When she was alone, this feeling totally submerged her.

No more than one thought she could have had, all this day, all this hell long day. Or was it a short day..?

She and Tidus had travelled all around Spira.

They had swum the sea of Besaid, met the Hypellos at the Moonflow, played Blitzball in the Luca stadium. They had travelled with the shoopof, with the hoover bikes, and of course with chocobos. They had visited LeBlanc, Ormi and Logos, Oaka XIII, Maechan (who took the occasion and told them the longest story ever..). And, finally, just a few hours ago, they had themselves sent packing away from a famous local in Bevelle.

She, and Tidus.

Thinking about this day, she couldn't but smile, no matter how sad the situation was.

She walked through the corridor, trying to stay between the two green-neon stripes on the metallic pavement, wanting to concentrate only on the echo of her step.

All this was _sick_.

But now she couldn't hope against hope anymore.  
She couldn't keep up believing this was just one day like any other day.  
Even the conversations, the jokes between her and Tidus... They just didn't look the same.

She had given out all of herself in this day, to make every minute be funny. And thank God it had been perfect. In that moment, she had actually forgotten whether it had been she or Tidus planning that day. They had always had such a symbiotic relationship...

The lift brought her to the deck. As soon as the bulkhead opened, a violent gust of wind invested her.

She loved this sensation so much.  
She just didn't care about the cold wind messing her hair under her band, or making her lips paler.  
Her eyes were lost in the sea of the star.

It was late night.  
Turning to midnight, to be precise.

This was...this was like her last night.

She had always been the obstinate type, always hoping that tomorrow could be better. _Should_ be better. But now... she had been spoiled from this option too.

No tomorrow anymore.

She leaned on the gullwing, symbol of the Celsius, not to lose her balance.

_Tomorrow_.

How many times did she come here, screaming like she was mad, until her voice refused to come out anymore? Unheard screams, which dissolved themselves into the infinity of the sky.  
How many times did she punched hard that metallic-deck until her knuckles were bleeding?

Since that day. Or maybe, since long before.  
And, of course, it all was so sick useless. Always.

Always, on every mission she took with Brother or whomever, strolling around Spira with the airship, she liked to come over here, on the deck, no matter if it was raining or snowing, having a certain fun just caressing the idea of jumping down. Soaring into the void. And making absurd hypothesis.

°°And what would my friends do, if I die?  
would they be sad..?  
What would _Yuna_ do? Would she _send_ me..?

And...what about him..? Would he be sad..?°°

Telling the truth, she had actually asked him, one time...

* * *

_It was nothing more than a stupid conversation they were having. It couldn't have been more useless. At least, until she said it, with such an ironic and light tone that made it even more scary. _

- Ehy. And what would you do, if I died..? - she pulled his shirt lightly, still smiling.

Tidus face changed suddenly, in an impressive way, too. She herself barely wanted to provoke such a reaction. She rather thought he was going to burst into laughter.

But it didn't happen, and she was already surprise because of this. All the joy and the stupidity of the conversation had just flown away.

Tidus put his hand behind her neck, to be sure Rikku was_ still there. _

- I would die with you. - was the answer.

Then_, he burst out into laughter. To send the tension away, most likely. Leaving her completely astonished._

wasThen_

* * *

_  
She remembered this like it was yesterday. Because she couldn't forget, although now both the hypothesis seemed ridiculously far, the way Tidus had said what he had said, making her feel like it was pure truth. 

That if she had dead, he _would_ have died with her.

But _all_, all of these illusions...all of these fabulas...they had turned into a poison for her own blood, hurting harder and harder.

This night like never.

Because tomorrow...

Tomorrow they will all be exterminated by the reality.

Tomorrow.  
Tidus.  
Will.  
Marry.

Yuna.

* * *

AN: Please! If you read this, let me hear you! I need to know there are still Tikku fans out there...!  
By the way, excuse me for the terrible English..

Swamp-Eyes


	2. Memories

**Last Night**

**Chapter 2**

****

* * *

[QuickAN: _Italics_ is flashback]

* * *

__

_- Rikku!! You heard the news?? Finally! _Finally_ they made up their mind! Tidus and Yuna are going to marry! They will_ marry_, do you get it!? They annunciated it during the meeting, today! This time it's so official! Isn't this absolutely great?! -  
  
Probably this was the happiest Wakka she had ever seen.  
His hands shaking her shoulders, his enthusiastic smile....  
  
All off these elements hurt her even more than she already was.  
  
That was pure shock.  
  
Suddenly she wasn't able to reason anymore, and her brain just _wouldn't_ work.  
  
Seeing that Wakka was now staring perplexed at her, she managed, after a few second of what would be commonly defined as a total paralysis ,to summon such a forced enthusiasm that thinking about it now was really sick., and she took Wakka's hands.  
  
- Yeeeeesss!! That's _wonderful_!!! - she shouted with an exaggeratedly shrill voice, jumping like she was mad around Wakka; she was gathering in that gesture all her anger, because_ there wasn't _another place where to gather it. - And when?? Where..???  
  
Wakka, seeing her so happy, brightened himself up again, and he was really close to start jumping around like her.  
  
- Surely in less than a month!! I'm quite sure the ceremony will take place in Bevelle! I'm already_ so _excited! There are _thousand _things that we must prepare! It has to be perfect! The marriage of the ex-High Summoner! Now I must spread the news! See you later, Rikku! -his voice was so full of emotion...so fervent... Hearing the grumpy Wakka speaking like that, would probably have caused her to burst into laughter, in another time and place.  
  
But now... _Now_..  
  
Wakka hugged her quickly, patting her shoulder, then he ran away, through the main path of Besaid.  
  
,,,,,,,,  
  
Her mind was whirling around itself.  
She felt lost und incapable to react.  
  
They..._ They will_...  
  
She struggled to extract something which was not nonsense from the Caos in her head.  
  
They....  
  
"I don't want to see them.  
I _cant_ meet them, now. Cant look their faces."  
  
So she ran away., taking the first ship which was leaving the Besaid port.  
  
She actually had no idea where to go, neither did she care. The decision itself seemed absurd even to her, but in that moment she thought she had no alternatives.  
Because just one thing was occupying her mind.  
  
"Cant look their faces"  
  
,,,,,,,,  
  
After having rent a Hover-Bike at the beginning of the Mihen Highroad, not even listening to the Al Bhed women shouting she had forgotten the change, Rikku just drove for at least four hours, a fast as she can._ Pointlessly.  
  
_The faster she drove, the louder the wind screamed in her ears; and since that seemed to erase all her thought, she was driving faster and_ faster_.  
  
Probably she wasn't even crying, or was she..?  
She barely noticed night was falling.  
  
"Why? _Why _are you so surprised? Haven't you known this from_ always_? Wasn't this as clear as the sun when you saw them kissing that night in Macalania lake? When you saw them reuniting in the sea of Besaid less than a year ago?  
  
Wasn't this always just_ so obvious _it seemed even_ stupid_?  
  
So why?  
Why were you always under illusion?  
Why have you always thought that it wasn't really sure, that maybe it was just....  
  
And the more thing were getting clearer, the more you cried for the impossible.  
  
You did never really stop hoping.  
  
_Stupid_."  
  
,,,,,,,,  
  
She stopped, and dismounted the Hover-Bike.  
She took a look around. The street was completely deserted, and apparently, completely silent too.  
But there was not dead silence.  
  
She concentrated and listened carefully to the chilly night air.  
  
Then she recognized the usual electricity noises, accompanied by the light- blue flashing in the night horizon.  
The Temple of Djose...  
  
"I'm all alone"  
  
Her thoughts were hovering around, when suddenly the image of a certain Al Bhed guy with an eye-patch came to her mind.  
  
So she ran towards the temple._

_,,,,,,,,,,_

_  
When the massive doors of the temple opened creaking, the group of Al Bhed people, who were having an animated discussion examining what seemed to be a new prototype of machina, got distracted by the sudden noise. They all turned to Rikku.  
  
Among them there was Gippal, too.  
  
And when he saw his old friend Rikku, Cid's brat, as he loved calling her (and by the way as she hated being called), he was both surprised and a little irritated.  
  
Well, that meeting wasn't exactly a joke, and suspending it because of that little annoying girl....  
  
But when he saw her approaching the group of Al-Bhed, her spiral eyes completely void moving nervously in every direction, until meeting his good eye, her face, her arms, all so pale, even her lips contracted in a grimace he had never said before on her, his heart literally fell, and he immediately felt guilty for the terrible and egoistic thought of before.  
  
Rikku, the rainbow of the Al Bhed tribe, had now lost all her brightness.  
She used to bring joy and light everywhere she went. Now she was dead grey, and she looked as she was carrying such a terrible desperation..  
  
- Gippal.. - her voice was just a little louder than a whisper as she grabbed Gippal shirt with trembling hands, leaning her head on his shoulder.  
  
Never, he had never seen her in such a condition.  
  
Gippal looked tentatively at the other Al Bhed, who were staring at them, perplexed but interested. He didn't know what to say.  
  
- Famm.... Kuut hekrd! - was all he managed to say.  
  
He hugged Rikku and dragged her away._

_,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
  
- Rikku..!? What the hell happened? _Please_, say something!  
  
But she just kept on crying without saying a word, hiding her face with her hands, as she herself was ashamed of what was happening to her. She let Gippal carry her everywhere as she wasn't even noticing it.  
  
When Gippal finally understood that Rikku _wouldn't_ stop crying, he felt a certain angst rising inside him.  
  
God,_ the way _he felt seeing her like that...  
Surely recently her happiness hadn't seen as sincere al always.. but now...  
  
She was collapsing in front of him.  
  
- Rikku, God, you're scarin' me, you know..? Please tell me what's wrong... - he tried to hug her, but she didn't even notice it.  
She didn't even look his face.  
  
She just look like she was on another planet._

_,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
  
The morning after, Gippal entered her room swaying a little.  
  
Last night he had listened to her incessant monologue, tried to cheer her up and whatever else, but he himself had remained astonished seeing_ how useless _it all was.  
So he had decided to leave her alone, because maybe that was what she needed.  
  
Now she was sleeping, her cheeks spotted with red- a clear sign she had cried herself to sleep.  
  
He caressed her head trying not to wake her.  
  
All this story had quite shocked him. Of course he had imagined something about Rikku liking Tidus, but he would have _never_ imagined that her feeling were so damn strong...  
  
He hadn't slept well, and in addiction to that he had been waked by Nadala shouting the news of the marriage between Tidus and Yuna with joyful voice in all the temple.  
  
"Really this is spreading quite fast.." he thought sarcastically.  
  
Maybe it was just him, but... he had never liked that two as a couple...Tidus and Yuna.. so obvious.. so_ boring_...  
And seeing his friend Rikku bearing such a sorrow, really didn't make it look better...  
  
- Gippal... - this was Rikku's voice, low and sleepy, distracting him from his thoughts.  
  
She was quiet now, but_ sad.  
_Gippal could say she had changed during the night. Now she looked _resigned_.  
  
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
_

_°°Hello. Yuna here°° the voice of the high summoner could be heard by the both of them; they were leaning their ears on the same receiver.  
  
- Ehy Yuna. It's Gippal. - he said with his usual tone, low and deep.  
  
°°Gippal! It's you! Did you see Rikku!? We cant find her since yesterday! She didn't even come back home last night..! Please, tell me she's with you!!°° the hail of questions literally invested them. There was sincere apprehension in Yuna's words, and that made Rikku feel guiltier than she already felt.  
  
- Yes, yes... don't worry. She's here at the Djose Temple.. - he answered, patting Rikku's head.  
  
°°Oh! So she's there! Thank Yevon! We were all _so_ worried! She disappeared without saying a thing..! Just.. what's wrong with her?! Can I speak with her?°°  
  
At this question Rikku became upset, shaking her head,widening her eyes , moving pointlessly her hand right before Gippal'eye.  
  
The message was clear: no, she didn't want to talk to Yuna.  
  
- Ehm..Er- Actually you cant. She... she's getting ready.  
  
°°Getting ready..? For what..?°°  
  
Rikku and Gippal stared interrogatively at each other for a couple of seconds. Then Gippal spoke again.  
  
- Well, you know. She came here because she wanted to do a trip in Bikanel with me. We have had this project for a long time... so... anyway, she's not here with me at the moment.  
  
Both Rikku and Gippal were anxious to see what was Yuna going to say now.  
There was silence on the other side.  
  
°°Mh. I see..°° she was clearly unsatisfied °°I just wanted to tell her something...nothing important but.. anyway, Bikanel? You're going to Bikanel? But why didn't she...  
  
°°°Ehy Yuna! Is Rikku ok? So she's with Gippal right? _Right_..?°°°  
  
As soon as she heard Tidus' voice interrupting Yuna, Rikku stiffened, and leaned her ear closer –if possible- on the receiver.  
  
Tidus...  
  
°°Yes, she's there. So be quiet...°°  
  
°°°Can I talk to her..?°°°  
  
°°No, honey, I'm afraid not... Gippal, says she's not with him now..°°  
  
Gippal looked at Rikku, who was just listening, lowering her gaze.  
  
°°°But _is _she ok?°°°  
  
°°I guess so... love, now just calm down.. ok? Gippal..? You still there?  
  
- Of course! So you have nothing to worry about. Rikku will be fine with me.  
  
°°Ok... then just tell her to come back home as soon as possible..°°  
  
Gippal waited for a moment.  
Then he took a deep breath, and the words slipped out of his mouth, his voice lower then before.  
  
- So, Yuna.. I heard the news.  
  
For a few seconds there was just silence, then Yuna let out an exclamation, of both surprise and awkward,  
  
°°Oh..!°° Gippal could imagine her, cupping her mouth with her hand, her eyes widened.  
  
- Congratulation, Yuna.  
  
°°Thank you, Gippal.°°  
  
- _Probably_ you could have found something better than that fellow, but, hey, it's your choice.- he continued in a strange tone.  
  
Yuna laughed lightly and sweetly.  
  
°°So.. say hello to Rikku for me...°°  
  
°°°And for me too!°°° Tidus shouted. But his voice was really padded. Probably he was in the other side of the room.  
  
- See you soon, then  
  
°°See you soon, Gippal..°°  
  
The conversation stopped, and Gippal put the receiver in its place.  
  
He and Rikku stared at each other. Then she spoke.  
  
- You do have a crush on her, don't you? -  
  
He didn't even get upset. It was not of him doing such a thing.  
  
- Ah..- he just groaned  
  
It was impossible to say whether he was lying or not. _

* * *

Rikku smiled when she remembered that.  
At that time, she thought that day was the worst day of her life.  
  
Then, one day after another, she just surpassed her crisis, and got caught by the illusions _another time_.  
  
It was just a month before the marriage, but nothing was sure.  
Three weeks, but nothing was said, that's what she kept telling to herself, even when she saw them kissing in the paths of Besaid, or walking hugging each other with enormous smiles.  
Two weeks, but it wasn't a matter if Yuna was already said to be pregnant. One week, but it was only a case if Tidus ignored her systematically because of the preparation of the ceremony.  
  
Because _maybe someday_...  
  
Now this was gone.  
  
"I must stop this.. I must have fun this night."  
  
Zanarkand ruins were now incredibly close.  
  
She smiled and hurried to the bridge, to help Tidus with the landing

* * *

[AN: Hello to you all!! I was so happy with the review, I swear it, really _really _happy! I love you! I hope you liked this chapter please tell me.. and..  
  
TIKKU ROCKS!!  
  
Swamp-Eyes] 


	3. Spash!

**Last Night**

* * *

**Chapter 3**   
  
They both just stood there, with a surprising lack of joy.  
So now they really had landed at Zanarkand.  
  
The pyre flies were lounging around them, a far echo was audible, a lament from the sky, or something like that. But it was actually all void.  
None of them wanted to speak; they were assorted in their thoughts.  
  
Rikku had visited that place at least a thousand times, but it still didn't change.  
  
If not for those stupid little monkeys, that were now jumping in the exact place where they had camped all together for the last time, three years before.  
  
It was impossible to erase those terrible moments, in which she had been searching in herself a way –_any_ way- to save her cousin; it had been an overwhelming fight against the time, because she loved her so much... but, still, hated her when she saw Tidus caressing her shoulder with such a sweetness, that his feeling would have been less plain if he had yelled directly 'I love you' to her.  
  
Who could have guessed, that was Yuna the one going to do it.  
  
Later, in such a natural way... in front of all the others, in front of_ her_...  
  
Surely Yuna didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings, but... well, if she hadn't been satisfied with the kiss, surely this _had_ destroyed her.  
  
°°I love you°°  
She had really said that. _Really_.  
  
Rikku had had to keel down in front of the summoner's courage.  
Still, it was too easy to say such a thing while being sure to be returned.  
  
For her, instead, it would have been a completely different thing.  
  
And...  
  
- Rikku?- as Tidus called her, she turned to him, her eyes wide open.  
  
- Yes..?- she asked – You.. you want to go back...?  
  
Effectively, it was absolutely not early.  
It was always later.  
_Much_ later.  
  
"I don't want this to finish now! _Not yet_, please...Just.."  
  
But looking at Tidus' face, it was quite clear that the idea of concluding the day hadn't yet even lightly touched him.  
  
- You mean, going home? No, no, of course not! I wanted to go to the Gagazet Cave...is it ok for you?  
  
Rikku's eyes brightened.  
  
- The cave? It a fantastic idea! Let's go!  
  
- We can walk... or are you tired? – Tidus asked, with a certain concern in his voice.  
  
- Tired? Who, _me_? I can return to Besaid running and swimming, you know?  
  
Tidus chuckled  
- If you say so... 

- - - - - - - -

They had carried their weapon with them , respectively her God Hand and his Ultima Weapon, because usually there were some monster on the way to the Cave, and quite dangerous ones, to be precise. But they all appeared to be asleep in the silent night of Zanarkand.  
  
There were only their steps resounding on the rock.  
  
When they finally reached the cave, moving some steps inside, on the iridescent material -what _was_ it..? Rock..? Glass, maybe? she had always wondered- and Rikku saw what she saw, her heart filled with joy.  
  
- _Water_!?! - she cried out enthusiastically.  
  
And, actually, exactly like three years before, the cave was occupied by water, and the original lake was there again.  
  
The rocks –or whatever else- couldn't but sparkle even more under the crystalline water, and the surface seemed to be covered by million of glittering spots, like as someone had poured all the stars of Zanarkand in that pool.  
  
- Wow..! I didn't know.. didn't _imagine_..  
  
Rikku was breathless.  
  
She had always loved that cave, and when she had come back there, one year before, and she had discovered that all the water had disappeared, she had felt a lump in her throat.  
  
First of all, because she reckoned that that lake was one of the most beautiful place on Spira.  
And then, because in a way it was connected with her memories. It was always her, Tidus', and Wakka's job, as they were the only swimmers in the party, to dive in, fight, and face the Trials to make way for all the others.  
  
She remembered gladly that moments, among the few in which she could stay with Tidus, without Yuna and the others being around.  
  
And she didn't care if he focused more on her just because there wasn't Yuna by his side – because usually the summoner had _complete_ monopoly of _all_ his attentions and efforts – she just didn't care.  
  
She could stay with him.  
And this was enough.  
  
Two years ago, neither Tidus nor the water were there.  
Now they had both returned.  
This was sadly perfect.  
  
Tidus jumped on the last glowing stair  
  
- Yuna told me the water had disappeared... so it must have retuned not long ago.. – he was concentrated, his gaze on the surface, a slight smile.  
  
Hearing Yuna's name wasn't exactly an elixir for her, but didn't cut off her enthusiasm anyway.  
  
Giggling she reached Tidus' stair, and she plunged her hand into the water.  
It was chilly, but not cold.  
  
She jumped back to her feet, unable to stop smiling.  
- I'm so happy!!  
  
Tidus at first smiled at her in a relaxed way, but then his expression became strange...  
  
- Ehy Rikku..? – he said, slowly moving closer to her –You like the lake, don't you?  
  
She stayed on guard, moving a step back, but Tidus had almost reached her.  
  
"He's plotting som-"  
  
- So what about a swim?  
  
Before she could do anything, or at least _realizing_ what was happening, she felt shoved, and she lost her balance.  
All the glittering of the cave flashed in her eyes, until the water wrapped her up.  
  
For some instants she struggled in the chilly liquid, then she reached the surface, taking a deep breathe.  
And immediately she heard Tidus' limpid laughter echoing in the cave.  
  
- _You_! – she cried out, shaking her head. But her numerous tresses were literally plastered to the side of her face, and the water reached to her shoulder.  
  
Tidus looked at her, then he collapsed again, laughing –if possible- even more than before, leaning forward, his hand pressed on his chest.  
  
Rikku moved towards the bank, Tidus' boots right before her eyes  
  
- You... you... you _big meanie_!! – she yelled.  
  
He, trying to recover from the laughter attack, answered  
  
- You still say that..? Only children use that word!  
  
- And _who_'s supposed to be the child between us? _Who_ tossed me into the water? – she insisted clutching her fists – It's cold here!  
  
He was still chuckling, but he held his hand out  
- C'mon, get out...– his tone turned softer.  
  
- Oh, how _kind_ of you! – she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.  
  
Then she grabbed Tidus' hand, and immediately, as he squeezed hers to pull her out, all of her thoughts began whirling in her mind quicker.. or were they frozen..?  
  
"Such a minor thing is enough to...?"  
  
- Ehy, you know, you should collaborate...you're not exactly weightless... - he kidded, leaning forward and arching an eyebrow.  
  
But then Rikku childish part overcame her romantic part.  
  
With a vindictive impulse, she suddenly hanged on Tidus' hand with her full weight, pulling him towards her.  
  
- What the..- now it was his turn of being unable to finish the phrase, and he fell down into the water even more ungracefully than her.  
  
Now _she_ was laughing, like she was mad, and it felt so easy...she hasn't laughed in such a way for a long time, and she was getting totally transported by it.  
  
While she was still unsuccessfully trying to remove her tresses from her face, unable to concentrate, Tidus re-emerged, his blond bangs stuck to his forehead.  
  
- I knew it... I _knew_ it... - he pretended to be angry, but a smile was tugging his lips.  
  
- Well, you must have _expected_ it, since _you_ did this to me... - Rikku said, her hands on her hips.  
  
- Just shut up! – Tidus moved insidiously towards her – You're going to _pay_ for this.  
  
- Ehy..?? What are you up to..? Stay away! – to protect herself, Rikku splashed him a little.  
  
He moved back, turning his head, and she took the occasion and splashed him harder.  
  
- So you want war!! – Tidus make such an effort in splashing her back, that she was literally invested by water, but trying not to be defeated by laughter, she responded with a new splash-attack.  
  
In less than ten seconds, the cave had become a hell of splashes, and all around them was gleaming and shining.  
It would have been wonderful to see, but Rikku was so caught in the battle, that she couldn't even open her eyes, and her jaws were hurting for the laughter.  
  
What was the last time she had been so happy?  
She didn't really remember...

* * *

AN: Good evening –or whatever else- to you all! As always, I thank you for the reviews: it's such a great support... THANK YOU! Just to explain something: this _is_ a one-shot, technically. But I decided to divide it into a few chapters... (what a nonsense...). Ok, let's cut off this stupid Author- notes... I'll try to update this soon...  
  
=)  
  
Swamp-Eyes


	4. Revival?

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* * *

Last Night**

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QuickAN: _Italics _is flashback

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**Chapter 4**

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_- Wakka, you sure you're going for it..? – a quite perplexed Tidus asked, and his tone suggested he was not so far from losing his patience. He let himself fall backwards into the water lazily, doing the dead-man's float and staring at the ceiling of the cave.  
  
- This cave _do_ rock... - he affirmed then.  
  
- Really. - Rikku agreed, swimming quietly towards the bank; then she grabbed Wakka's ankle.  
  
- Wakka, can you do this or not? – she asked, peering at how the blitzball player seemed completely incapable to hit the target with the ball.  
  
One of the Trials of the sacred Mt. Gagazet, of course. And that meant: their job.  
  
- Tidus, you too!! Cant you help him? Doing something, _anything_?? – Rikku shook Tidus' arm, constricting him to leave his former position.  
  
- No! He _cannot_ help me, got it? – Wakka reacted briskly – Now it is a question between me _and_ that damned target! I have to do it by myself! Until then, we're staying here; would it be for five minutes or five hours. – he tried with another hit, but it turned out to be a failure just like all the others.  
  
- **Fryd**!? – let out Rikku with shrill voice, widening her eyes and punching the water.  
  
- Drop it, Rikku... - Tidus touched her slightly on her shoulder – Seems like our redhead is such a stubborn ass, who will make us go mouldy in this pool...  
  
- You know, you can always get out of there, ya? – Wakka exhorted him, hissing the words while failing another shot.  
  
- Nah. I like it. – Tidus concluded, falling again in the water.  
  
- Well, now, if you two _are_ happy... - Rikku shrugged, swimming around, trying to go as far as possible from Wakka. Then, with a deep sigh, she leaned her back on one of the iridescent walls.  
  
They were warm.  
  
She closed her eyes, and let her aching arms float in the water. She couldn't deny she was tired: they had been fighting quite hard in the last hours...  
The fact that now Wakka's swears sounded further made her feel more relaxed, actually.  
  
- What are you doing? – Tidus' voice, who had followed her, distracted her from her thoughts suddenly.  
  
- Mh. Nothing. -  
  
- Ah... - Tidus rolled his head, a tired expression on his face – I'm exhausted... - he complained with a quite hoarse voice, swaying towards her  
  
- I am, too. And it looks like we will wait here for a _long_ time... - she sighed, putting a hand on her forehead, and hinting at Wakka's incessant swearing.  
  
- Right... - chuckled Tidus.  
  
He looked at her for a few seconds, then he said indifferently  
- Well, then, wake me when this is over...  
  
Immediately after, he let his head rest on her shoulder, groaning just a little.  
  
Rikku immediately felt the enormous rush of blood to her cheeks, which were now probably burning.  
  
- E-Ehy! What are you doing? Are you exploiting me as a pillow? I don't know, you want me to _cuddle_ you, too, or what? – she asked sarcastically, but with hints of tension in her voice.  
  
There was silence for a while, then Tidus adjusted his head on her shoulder  
  
- Why not.  
  
He simply said.  
  
Though his voice was quite –how to say it- _emotionless_, like he was just talking about the weather, Rikku's heart melted.  
  
Every twisted nerve, every tensed muscle, _all_ was just loosing; she couldn't say wheter it was happiness or infinite sadness the feeling which was taking her.  
  
Tidus was so, _so_ near...  
This was rare to the point of being unique.  
  
She hesitated for a moment, then she touched lightly the hair behind his nape, barely caressing his neck.  
  
This..  
This was...  
"I..."  
  
There was no reaction. She couldn't breathe.  
  
She repeated the same gesture with more conviction, making one of his wet bangs slip through her fingers.  
  
"I cant believe this..."  
  
She couldn't believe she was _allowed_ to do such a thing...  
That was so improbable, she thought she was dreaming.  
  
It was impossible to state if Tidus in that moment actually _could_ sense her desperation, or he just needed a substitute of Yuna.  
  
Anyway, the third time she reached for his hair, Rikku felt a touch on her arm.  
  
Instinctively she withdrew her hand back, caught by agitation.  
  
"Did I..."  
"Does he want me to stop..?"  
"Maybe I did something wron-  
  
Finally she noticed he was just stroking her.  
He was _stroking_ her.  
  
Her heart missed one beat.  
Really she had never ever hoped about this.  
  
All she could do now was continuing what she had interrupted.  
  
"This is...."  
"I'm_ cuddling _him...."  
"I..."  
  
"Impossible.."  
  
Though they were there, in the same place, Wakka's cusses were ridiculously far, now.  
And she was praying with all herself.  
  
"Fail again, Wakka. Keep failing. Don't hit the target. Please, just a little longer. _Fail_."_

__

_

* * *

_

After the exhausting splashing-fight, Tidus and Rikku had literally fallen for laughter, and now they were relaxing, floating in the water.  
  
Rikku's ears were beneath the surface so, even if Tidus had spoken, she wouldn't have heard anything.  
She could hear only her regular breathe echoing in her brain.  
  
Other didn't exist.  
She wasn't that far from falling asleep exactly there.  
  
- Tidus... – she said pointlessly, sure by the way that, like her, he couldn't hear anything, too.  
  
But immediately after having said it, she heard the sound of the water in her ears growing louder, and then she saw him standing beside her, peering at her face with a half-smile.  
  
She widened her eyes.  
  
- What's wrong? – Tidus asked. Or, at least, that was what she _thought_ she had understood reading on his lips.  
  
She abandoned her position, and with her ears not submerged by water, it was like returning to the reality.  
  
- You wanna go home? - Tidus asked. There was a hint of sadness in his voice.  
  
And Rikku felt again as she was drowning in depression.  
So that was the reality...  
It was all _so_ far when she and Tidus were splashing each other.. but...  
  
"I don't want to go home _anymore_..."  
  
In spite of that, she was able to laugh softly.  
  
- Eh eh.. it would be better, don't you think? Or are you planning to fall asleep on the altar tomorrow? – she kidded, thumping lightly his side with her elbow  
  
He first laughed, but then he groaned.  
  
- You know. Tomorrow morning Wakka want to come to my place at _four_ in the morning. He says we cant be late, and that way we can have time to adjust the last things.. – Tidus was shaking his head like he himself could hardly believe what he was saying, his eyes lost into the void – and, knowing him, I can say that he will decide to come a little _earlier_, and as a result at least at _half to four_ he will be knocking on my door...  
  
Rikku, who had tried to contain herself all the conversation long, finally burst out into laughter.  
  
- Oh Yevon! Wakka is so... so... _ridiculous_! At four in the morning... exactly in...  
  
- Yeah. Three hours and a half...  
  
- Definitively: tomorrow you _will_ fall asleep on the altar. – Rikku announced, placing her hand on his shoulder, with false sympathy.  
  
He laughed.  
  
And then, when she remembered about _what_ she was joking, a shadow fell on her face. And her smile froze.  
"_Three hours and a half_... We have only three hours and a half... It's... such a _little_ time..."  
  
- Rikku, is all ok...? – he tried to smile, while pulling delicately one of her small tresses  
  
She looked at him for some instants, then she lowered her gaze again, embarrassed  
  
- Y..Yes...But you know.. I think I am excited too, for tomorrow. I can barely believe it...- she tried to be as vague as possible.  
  
- Yes...it's.... _strange_. – he agreed – I think... I guess I'm _electrified._  
  
- You _must_ be electrified! I mean...it's your _wedding_! – she answered with shrill voice, trying to smile.  
  
He chuckled again.  
He was strange. His smiles were strange.  
There was something in him which suggested he was _tired_. In many ways.  
  
- Listen... - he started with low voice – I wanted to thank for all you've done today.. for all you've done for me.... Really, it has been a _great_ day. Thank you, Rikku.  
  
His words were so astonishingly sincere, that they broke all the barriers in Rikku's heart.  
  
- What? You don't need to say that! Really, I did noth..  
  
- Just _stop_ talking nonsense! – he interrupted her, arching his eyebrows, he stroked her hair quickly, then pulled her into a hug.  
  
She had to struggle with all herself to contain the urge of throwing her arms around him and holding him so tight...  
She couldn't... because.. because of..  
And as a result she ended up patting him hesitantly on his back.  
  
Tidus, before letting her go, gave her a long kiss on her cheek, and messed up her tresses again.  
  
And she should have _got used_ to this.  
How many times Tidus had hugged her, while they were joking, how many time had he kissed her, in the same friendly way of now, when there was a party, or after they had not seen each other for some time...  
  
It was _friendship_. But she..  
  
She didn't get used to this.  
Instead, she felt more and more annihilated every time it happened.  
  
And _this_... and _now_...  
It was the worst.  
  
She felt this like a farewell kiss. The hug, too. It just seemed there last hug.  
From tomorrow, _every_ kiss, _every_ hug... They would just be completely different.  
It was inevitable.  
  
She looked the water between them, having the vague sensation that her cheeks were red.  
  
He peered at her briefly, then he tried to shook her shoulder.  
  
- What's wrong with you? You've changed your expression completely since we have been here..  
  
Panic took her.  
  
- Who, _me_?! Of course not! I don't know... maybe I'm just.. mmmh.. tired? - she lied.  
  
- Do you want to go home? – he asked immediately.  
  
- NO! Er- I mean... Yes...Yes, if _you_ want to go home.. we're doing what _you_ want to do... I...I...If _you_ want to go home, then we're going home.  
  
"What a _pathetic_ speech..." she thought to herself.  
  
He effectively looked a bit perplexed, his eyebrow arched.  
But clearly she was not the problem.  
  
- No... - he finally said, looking the iridescent wall beside him. – Actually, I think I don't want to come back home _yet_...I ..maybe...I assume it's just the _tension_... - he ended shaking his head slowly.  
  
For quite a long time they stood there without moving, staring at two different points, their looks blank.  
  
Rikku had no more the strength to try and imagine what Tidus' was thinking about, neither she wanted to.  
  
Then she suddenly felt both her hands clasped, and turned to Tidus, surprised.  
Immediately she saw a childish enthusiasm on his face.  
  
- I just had a _great_ idea! – he stated.  
  
Rikku couldn't but smile.  
  
- And it is..?  
  
Tidus' eyes lightened up even more.  
  
- What about a revival of our past?  
  
She was bewildered.  
  
- A... a _revival_..? What do you mean?  
  
He cleared his throat.  
  
- Me and you – he explained – just like three years ago. Let's go fighting fiends. I thought someone of those Achelous would fit the occasion, nothing serious, of course.. No Wakka, but we can cope with this, cant we? You remember..? "The great swimmers trio"... - he laughed – now that I think about it... he just sucked with that Trial... So, what do you think about this?  
  
Even Rikku didn't know exactly _what_ could be so exciting about Tidus' idea.  
But it just sounded _wonderful_ to her.  
  
Go fighting fiends...  
"Sure that's romantic..." she giggled by herself.  
  
All her tiredness had faded away.  
  
- What do I say? – she answered with an enormous smile. – I say, _Let's Blitz_!  
  
That was their motto.  
They gave each other a five, and plunged into the water, carrying their weapons.

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**Author'sNotes**  
Well... mh... Hello to you all! So I updated! Eehehehe....  
School is over! YAY!  
Now... let's stop with the nonsense... About the fic... I think... (and i can say I'm quite sure about this...) that next chapter will be the last chapter!

So, you want Rikku to end up with Tidus or not...??

Of course I have already planned it... it's just to know...  
Again thank you to all my rewiewers! THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!

Swamp-Eyes


	5. Last night

**Last Night **

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:

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**Chapter 5 **

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**

After nearly an hour spent fighting fiends, Tidus and Rikku re-emerged in the main lake of the cave, both spitting water and laughing hysterically. 

And as soon as their laughter were close to dye down, they looked at each other, and began with it again.  
Rikku was even crying, and her jaws were aching.

- Oh Yevon... oh Yevon... - she chuckled, almost breathing hardly – that fishes... they just were so _ridiculous_!

Tidus burst out again, even louder. He tried to say something, but he didn't managed to do it.

They had started with the idea of fighting seriously; but in less than ten minutes, the entire situation had degenerated.  
Tidus had used the Dark Attack on a group of Piranhas, and as a result those had begun floundering around, blinded, being close to attack each other. They were so idiot...

Tidus and Rikku really had had an hearty laugh.

- Surely Wakka _did _suck at the Trials, but when he used this spell, it was always howlingly funny... - Tidus said, removing his hair from his forehead.

- And now we know this spell too! – echoed Rikku enthusiastically, her thumb up.

Tidus placed his sword on the edge of the pool.  
- Man those fiends were really _weak_... or it's just that we've become invincible..? – he asked her with a proud smile.

- Well we _are_ invincible. – she stated.

- Oh... how very... _modest_ of you. – he laughed – Anyway... I thought I would have found you out of training... - he provoked her.

She turned red

- W..what! Me _out of training_? You got to be kidding me!

He laughed again, and then, before there was time to decide what to do next, he flung himself backwards into the water.  
He really didn't look like he wanted to go back home.

But it was two o'clock.

------------

As there were no other alternatives, they were now just floating in the water again.

The time was passing really slowly.  
One minute was like one century.

The more Rikku stayed there doing nothing, waiting for what _eventually_ was going to happen the day after, the more she felt like a victim, offering her chest to the her killer's blade, without trying to stop it.

Was there a way to take that weight off her heart?  
Was there a way...?

"Yes, there is a way. It will be all over when this terrible night finishes. When he _marries_. All over. Far away." The voice inside her kept repeating.

But she was not able to listen to it completely.

And what about this? What about she was _not_ going to be able to forget this?  
In that case, how would it have been, having to cope with these feelings all her life long, and maybe even _longer_?

"I would rather dye tomorrow."  
But until tomorrow... it was such a long time...  
The wait was so long that it was consuming her.

"Tell him"  
The other voice. The other, insane, voice.  
The little voice she always mistreated, suffocated, repressed using strength.

:Stop with this! _Stop_! Let's go away! All this has just to finish as soon as possible, and it will be okay:

/Tell him/

Probably her expression was not relaxed. She couldn't manage to pretend anymore.  
Not even the numerous Pyreflies, which were lounging both in the water beneath her and in the rest of the cave, memorials of the killed fiends, were able to calm her down.

:I want this to finish:

---------------

Time was passing by. Impossible to state _how much_ time was passing by.

Then Tidus' face appeared upon hers. His expression was not exactly quiet, but surely it was better than hers.  
And as soon as she saw him, she became completely aware that this was the _last_ stop.

Then, as she didn't want to hear it said by him, she immediately said _it_.

- We must go. – as she was still in the water, she couldn't hear herself. But her words echoed in her throat.  
She wasn't able to abandon her position. She wanted the water to support herself.

- Yeah. I really guess so. – she read on his lips. – Or you want to stay here?

Rikku smiled lightly.

/Here's the last stop/

:It's the last stop:

/Do something/

:It's the last stop:

Tidus grabbed her wrist, dragging her on the surface.  
She laughed.

- Comfortable, isn't it? – he asked with a smile.

She laughed again, but laughing in that moment just looked impossible.

/It's the last stop  
The last stop  
The end.  
The terminus/

She had never decided it before.  
Never planned it.  
Really.

But in that moment, and in that moment _only_, she understood that there was just _that_ possibility.

- Wait -

------------

- Wait -

Rikku stood up in the water.

Until that moment, all the things in the world had been spinning one-way around her, a way she had never been able to control.  
So she had always contemplated them, were they beautiful or awful, sitting still.

Now, even having stopped Tidus, made her felt like she had just jumped right in the middle of them.  
So she was whirling with all the rest.

/You can decide/

I...

- Yes? What's wrong? – Tidus asked kindly, really far from being irritated because their leaving was being delayed again – Is it all okay..? Mh?

- Y...Yes...I mean.. I... I need to talk to you.

He frowned just a little.

- Tell me.

- It's... It's that... - her throat was burning – I'll try to be quick. – but actually she paused. And her expression definitively broke up. – I'm so _stupid_...- she stopped, showing him her back.

- Rikku..? What...

/It's the last stop/

And when Rikku turned back to him, she had her eyes closed.  
She opened them, now staring at him.

"I have always known this. If this _has_ to happen, it has to happen _this way_"

- I... love you.

Dead silence.  
For some instants, all in the cave, apart from the Pyreflies, froze.

Tidus didn't even changed his expression, nor one of the two turned the gaze away.

"I said this"  
/You said this./  
:You said this...:

Rikku let her head fall forward, the glass-beads in her small tresses tinkling at her movement.

- I'm sorry – she said.

Tidus was speechless. But even when she thought he was going to say something, she prevented it, _fearing_ to hear, repeating

- I'm sorry. I'm _sorry_... I... - she shook her head lightly. – I... I _do_ understand that this is an egoistical deed. I'm sorry... I... I mean.. telling this now... telling this _today_... I never intended to...  
It's just that... Tidus, I'm sorry... I _don't know_ what I want to obtain doing this...  
I know that maybe I'm just bothering you... that I'm creating _problems_.. but you...you don't have to say anything... and... – she swallowed.

Then she looked again at him, and continued.

- ..and...and...listen.. I don't know _when_... since when... I mean.. all I know is that one day I understood I was living for _you_. That when I was frightened, it was _you_ the one I wanted to stay with. That when I was upset, it was _you_ the one I needed to look at. It's been... _three years_... They all say I'm changed... But I don't know.. – she took a deep breathe – I really don't know if it's true. In every moment: when we met for the first time, when we re-encountered at the Moonflow. In every place we've been: in the Thunder Plain, in Sanubia desert, in the Tower of the Dead inside Sin. And when you... disappeared. When you reappeared. Actually – she placed her hand on her heart – you have _never_ gone away from here.  
If you were not with me, I would probably have given up a long time ago.  
_I love you._  
I'm sorry.  
You can deny this, or pretend you didn't hear this.You can reject me.You can get angry.You can even laugh, if you want to.And you can do absolutely nothing.  
That's not important.  
I _had_ to do this, anyway. For myself, too.  
I love you.  
But don't worry, because... because _whatever happens_, whatever you'll say or do now, tomorrow... tomorrow I... - the smile on her lips was terribly sad. – Tomorrow morning I will be the usual, cheerful, enthusiastic Al Bhed girl, the one all want to see, and I will be celebrating in the first row, throwing flowers on you and Yuna with a huge smile. _As nothing... had ever happened.  
_  
Silence.  
A Pyrefly hovered between Tidus and her.

All those words..  
All that endless monologue...  
All had just come out with incredible ease.

She noticed that Tidus' expression was shocked, now. Probably it had changed little by little at each of her words, but she had not seen it but now.

Then he finally spoke.

- Ri..Ri..Rikku.. – his voice was hoarse – You never... You just _never_..

She immediately understood.

- And how could I. – that was not even a question. Tidus, seeing all that resignation, really became aware of _how much_ was Rikku actually changed.  
Because she really was.  
The fifteen-years old Rikku of three years ago, would have pronounced that same sentence struggling with shrill voice, punching the water.

Now, instead, the sadness in her was so deep, that she wasn't even crying. As it couldn't be _expressed_.

- ..how could I? You... you and Yuna.. you two represent the love and the peace in Spira... you two are an _untouchable_ symbol... a guarantee for all the people... an ideal for all the couples... They all worship you two. They all worship you two _together_... You're so... _perfect_... And I... I have _nothing_ to do with this... I just _cant_ ruin this... - his green eyes were void and terrified – I can only wish happiness for the both of you... because ...I really guess... - she chuckled – I really guess that I, compared to the happiness of Spira... _I am nothing.  
_  
There she finished.

Her lips were pale and contracted, like she was crying. But she was _not_ crying, as she turned her face away, not to look at Tidus anymore.

She was feeling neither better, nor worse.  
She was feeling completely different, and her head was spinning.

A Pyrefly touched her ear lightly, and its echo of Farplane caressed her mind.

- Rikku... - Tidus moved a little closer to her.

She didn't know whether she had done the right thing.  
She didn't know what would have happened since that moment.

She couldn't understand which words was Tidus whispering in her ear.

But she could _perceive_ that it was neither friendship nor sympathy, the feeling that Tidus' hands running on her back were transmitting.

It was not joking anymore, the way he was stroking her hair.

It was not because of a ceremony or a party that he was kissing her.

And when their lips met, it seemed completely right that way.

Rikku saw for a few seconds Tidus' eyes inches-distant from hers, before he closed it, and began kissing her again.

She looked for one last time at all the glittering in the cave, before closing her eyes too, and abandon herself at their first night together.

Their _last night_.  
:

The end  
:

* * *

:**Author'sNotes:  
**Ehy! So... it's over...!  
Eheheh I hope you liked the ending... I swear i cant imagine another possible ending.. I don't know.. What did you think? It's sad somehow... but hey.  
Ok, one last _huge_ thank you to all my reviewers, because you really made me happy. You want a sequel to this? Ehehe of couse i'm just kidding there's no way I'm doing that. I was just thinking about an extra chapter about a _very_ late Tidus meeting Wakka the morning after, but since it would be _really pointless_, there will be nothing.  
Maybe I will continue my other fic. Maybe you will see me again...  
Someday. 

Swamp-Eyes

**14/10/2005**: I'm surprised to see that people are actually still reading this fic. Maybe I should begin major editing, since every time I look at this I see errors sticking out practically everywhere... I'm also evaluating the idea of publishing the sequel I've written, even if it can be read as a completely different story, and most probably it isn't what you could be expecting. Maybe I'll publish it without even saying it's the sequel...I don't know.. it's not like it's going to happen tomorrow, anyway. I have to finish 'Subservience' first, that's for sure.

Thank you to all the people who had made it this far, thank you for reading, but especially never stop supporting Tikku!

Swamp-Eyes


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